Bill shares how West Kent Mind made a difference after years of living with PTSD

“I’ve had a varied life. I joined the British Army in 1966 and served in Northern Ireland, the Falklands, the Middle East and the Far East. After leaving the Army, I worked in a variety of jobs before unexpectedly becoming a carer nearly 20 years ago. It doesn’t compare with my Army career, because that was absolutely brilliant, but the twenty years I’ve spent as a carer are probably the second-best years of my life.

After I came back from the Falklands, I started having flashbacks. The media presented the war as clean, but it really wasn’t, especially up in the hills. The flashbacks turned into attacks which were really debilitating and happening every day. I have lived with PTSD for many years.

Coming to West Kent Mind has made a huge difference to me. If West Kent Mind didn’t exist, I would be really sunk. Every Thursday I come along to the Mindful Gardening group as a carer. Sometimes I chat to people, sometimes I just sit on the patio and let my mind wander. That’s the beauty of it; you don’t have to do anything. Sometimes just getting out of the house, being around other people, taking in the sunshine and letting your mind drift for a while is enough.

For a long time, I was encouraged to also try the men’s watercolour group as part of the Creative Mind programme. I’ll admit, I wasn’t keen. My initial thought was, “Who goes to do painting? That’s not for me.” But eventually I gave in.

I wasn’t in a good mood when I went to my first session, but I came away thinking, “That’s good. I enjoyed that.” Before long, I’d got to know everyone, and we became a close group of friends.

When the sessions came to an end, I wasn’t convinced we’d stay together. I thought people would drift away. But we didn’t. We started a WhatsApp group called the Jammy Dodgers, and we’re still meeting up now.

Since I started painting, things have changed. My attacks have become less frequent, I’m much calmer and I can put my thoughts into sentences. Painting also helped me discover something about myself. I’ve learnt to appreciate what I’ve created. The only painting I’d ever done before this group was camouflaging my face so people couldn’t see me in the jungle! Now, suddenly, I’ve painted a waterfall, and I actually think it’s brilliant.

I’ve also learnt that it’s okay to cry. It really helps to clear your mind.

I’m 77 now and getting ready to retire. I’ve got 500 vinyl records to listen to and plenty to keep me busy, but I know one thing for certain. I dread to think where I would be if I hadn’t come across West Kent Mind. It’s been an amazing help to me.”